Controlling your Developer Internal Monologue
Sometimes a bug might be the stubborn sort. Tied up in spaghetti code, anything you do to try to fix it seems to produce another bug.
Yet that’s not a problem for most software engineers. It happens.
Yet sometimes you simply can’t Frozen it (let it go). Worse things start to happen to you (in your head). You start to question yourself, your ability and even your right to exist. Your internal monologue is taking control and sending you to a dark place. You don’t feel good at all.
The Internal Loop
It’s perfectly normal to mull things over in your head. Sometimes it’s helpful, and as a software engineer, it can help you to think of solutions to difficult problems (or check that last commit).
Sometimes it is problematic as it seems to turn against you. This is particularly the case when deadlines loom or code reviews keep coming back time and time again. You start thinking things like “You’re not good enough” or “You’ll never fix this”, and imposter syndrome can strike the best of us.
If you let it, this voice inside you will turn an initially minor issue into an existential crisis.
Solutions
Reach out
If you can’t 1989 it (shake it off), there is no harm in seeking help. Reach out to a colleague for a second pair of eyes or talk to a friend or mentor about what is happening. Sometimes just saying your worries out loud can reduce their power over you.
Software development can be lonely, but at its core, it’s a team sport. Everyone in that team knows we have off days, and there is no shame in admitting that you are struggling. Sharing your experiences can help you realize that you’re not alone — and that it will George Harrison (All Things Must Pass).
Focus on What You Can Control
The one thing (other than code) you have control over is yourself. You might not be able to react to the clients or the deadlines, but you can control your reaction to them.
You are capable of approaching problems with a solution-focused mindset. It takes work, but it is possible to break a negative thought loop before it spirals out of control. This is all helped if you spend time being kind to yourself and give yourself the type of self-care that helps you perform as a software engineer.
Remember, you’re not just a code machine. You’re a human, with all the messy, complicated thoughts and emotions that come with it.
Conclusion
The next time your internal monologue starts to go into negative mode remind yourself that you’ve got this.
We’ve all fixed bugs before. You’ll fix this, and if you can’t It’s okay to take a step back and reassess. Or delete the project and quit (in that order). One of the two.