Musk Buys Musk From Musk, Says It’s Genius
Image: Author and ChatGPT
Elon Musk has announced that his AI startup has acquired X. It’s a bold move, selling yourself something and a repackaging of failure as innovation.
Well done to all involved!
The Bombshell
Elon Musk is able to announce news on X as and when he sees fit.
“xAI and X’s futures are intertwined. Today, we officially take the step to combine the data, models, compute, distribution, and talent.”
He doesn’t mention that the all-stock deal values X $11 billion lower than Musk’s purchase price. In the magical world of Musk accounting, the past is negotiable and the future is optional and an AI startup is worth more than an established social media platform. That’s a problem for developers, as things are moving so fast.
It’s all About Data
The truth is this is about the real value in these businesses. The data.
Musk could and should have just come out with the truth.
“I now own the data I already owned, but with a different company name slapped on top”
Because we need to get real. This isn’t about synergy, compute, or some utopian vision of AI for humanity. This is what you do when your social network is on life support and your AI company needs a data transfusion. And hey, if you can’t beat OpenAI with innovation, why not try lawsuit + hostile takeover + vibes?
I guess it beats laying off developers?
Failure as Innovation
Repackaging failure as innovation is a classic Musk move. Investors who backed his Twitter escapade might feel better now that it’s bundled up in xAI’s glossier narrative.
It’s less “oh no” and more “strategic pivot,” the corporate version of putting lipstick on a digital pig.
Since both companies are private, it is much easier to cook up these reshuffling schemes without too many prying eyes. Shared investors, shared infrastructure, shared boardrooms. It’s less acquisition and more… brand crossdressing?
I don’t know. None of this corporate messing around really makes any sense. I don’t make sense. You don’t make sense.
Conclusion
We find ourselves at the point where Musk is buying companies he already owns, training AIs on memes, suing companies he wants to acquire, and casually tinkering with democracy.
Don’t be surprised when the next headline reads:
Musk Acquires Himself in All-Stock Deal, Declares Personal Value Literally Infinite
Seriously, this all needs to stop.
Image: Author and ChatGPT