The Loneliness of the Modern Developer

As software engineers, we often seem to celebrate a bizarre form of camaraderie through detachment. Disconnection seems to be a rite of passage rather than something that prevents quality teamwork and impacts the quality of our code.

The Great Disassociation

No matter where I have worked, I’ve experienced a pervasive sense of isolation. That isn’t in the existential crisis way but in an “I don’t know your name” way, and I’ve seen this across multinationals, startups and everything in between.

Today is my birthday. Sure, I’ve received an automated email from HR to “celebrate”, and in the standup, someone spoke to me to ask about the status of my work (no tickets to work on, so no blockers thanks). I won’t speak to another soul all day.

I have to admit that I don’t feel very motivated.

The Isolation Tools

I think that the shift to remote work exacerbated the isolation phenomenon. I feel like I’m behind a screen and a muted microphone that nobody can ever break through.

Developers log in, give their status updates (“still working on ticket TS918, no blockers”) and zone out waiting for their turn to disconnect. This is a whole new level of detachment than needing to go into the office and at least smile at colleagues. The truth is I’ve seen colleagues completely drop off the radar only attending meetings to say nothing is happening (and the truth is that is me). One of my peers even managed to juggle two full-time jobs thanks to this new normal, often prioritizing his side gig over our team’s needs.

Asynchronous code reviews are going on but represent nothing more than a surface review of work. There isn’t a real communication channel and the idea that “nobody cares” is prevalent at least in my workplace. We all work in our own little silos and work is something that is simply your problem and not to be shared with others. I once spent an entire day waiting for a code review, only to have it blocked because the reviewer didn’t understand a basic feature. Frustrating? Absolutely. But it also highlighted how our interactions are largely superficial, limited to technical debates rather than any meaningful exchange of ideas.

I’m ashamed of the person I am Isolation, isolation, isolation

I’ve worked with several people for years, and while the claim that I don’t know their names is false it’s not far off. The perfect coworkers don’t exist, but I feel that people I’ve never hung out with shared a meal or discussed anything personal become just a method of getting pull requests into the codebase.

You might claim that we have a silent bond, but I don’t think so. Sitting silently in meetings isn’t doing it for me and I feel ever more alone and it’s not a good feeling.

Conclusion

The modern developer’s life is a paradox of isolation. In a team we work together, but separately. Bonds are formed in the silence of code; friendships are unspoken and increasingly any interaction is functional.

Maybe that’s the way we like it?

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